Well, I'm in a strange situation to say the least. And probably one that isn't too uncommon. So sit down, and don't you dare TL;DR me.
Let's start from the beginning. I went on vacation five years ago and spent one full week with a girl we'll refer to as Jane. Over this week, Jane and I bonded on our shared love of stupid *** movies, classic rock, and embarrassing others. But one thing that we definitely shared in common is that we were both undeniably attracted to each other, but too scared to make a move.
Jane and I kept in touch. We added each other on Facebook, and talked nearly every day. She lives a bit away. I won't list any states, but I'll just say she lives in New England and I live in the Bible Belt. Not across the country, but a distance away. And even after five years, the distance means nothing to me. I can safely say she has been my best friend in the world the entire time. I've told her everything, she's told me everything. She's the only person I can sit down and talk to after having a **** day, and after telling her all about it, I'll be laughing and smiling like it never happened. She means the world to me.
Well, as you'd guess, eventually we suppressed our feelings for each other and dated other people. I only dated one person, she dated several. The feelings came out and we talked about them sometimes, but we never acted on them. But recently, things have changed.
Last night, over a four hour late-night web cam talk, we admitted something very huge: we both still have very strong feelings for each other. I told her how I felt. She told me that she still has feelings, but has kept them locked down in her mind because of one person. And that person we will refer to as John.
John is Jane's boyfriend of two years. And while his heart is in the right place (Or for the most part at least), John is... Well... Kind of a dick. He doesn't listen to her, and constantly and continually does things that knowingly makes her uncomfortable, and gets mad when she asks him to stop. He even waved the fact that her friend committed suicide in her face during a fight merely DAYS after it happened. Yet he still talks, all the time, about how he wants to marry her and spend the rest of his life with her. And it aggravates THE PISS OUT OF ME.
So, this is where the predicament comes in. I want to be with her, oh so very very badly, and we both have had feelings for each other for a long time. But this John fellow is kind of in the way. She's even said that herself. As we talked last night, she even started talking and thinking of ways to end things with him. She even went as far as coming up with what would be the "Easiest way for things to happen."
But what holds her back is his feelings. Her friend that committed suicide took his life because his girlfriend left him, and it's only been two weeks since that. And last time they broke up, he started cutting and drinking. She doesn't want to leave him and then him start to hurt himself. And I don't want that to happen either.
I would never want to be the person to make her choose... Trying to choose between your best friend and your lover is the worst decision you could try to make. I could never make her choose between him and I. But I know there's gonna be a day when it'll have to happen...
What do I do guys? Seriously?
We both have strong feelings for each other. I've stated strongly that I want to be with her, and she's beat around the bush that feels the same way. But this guy... What do I do? I don't want to lose my best friend, but at the same time, I've never felt like this before. About anyone, ever.
It's conflicting and confusing, and I hate it. I just don't know what to do now. It's nearly too much.
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Thread: Welp... In a weird spot.
06-20-2012 09:24 PM #1
- Join Date
- Feb 2012
Welp... In a weird spot.