Family Guy Quotes!
[An extremely obese Peter and Brian are sitting on the dock]
Boy: Daddy, what's that?
Father: Well son, that's Mercury, the closest planet to the sun. What it's doing down here on the wharf I haven't the foggiest, we should probably go ask a scientist.
Peter: I'm a man, jackass.
Stewie: No sprinkles. For every sprinkle I find, I shall kill you
Stewie: [To ticket agent] Now look here...
[looks at agent's name tag]
Stewie: Jo-LENE. I have an army to raise and I must get to Managua at once. I require a window seat and an in-flight Happy Meal. BUT NO PICKLES. OH, GOD HELP YOU IF I FIND PICKLES.
Li: Stewie, come complete our rainbow.
Stewie: I've got a better idea. Let's go play "swallow the stuff under the sink."
Southpark quotes!
Cartman: Damn, shit, respect my fuckin' authority!
Cartman: Attention shoppers! Outside today, we have a cripple fight. Cripple fight, outside!
Stan: Hey, do you know where I can find the clitoris?
Cartman: What is that like finding Jesus or something?
Randy Marsh: You see, Token, when a man and a woman really love each other, the man puts his penis into the woman's vagina. It's called 'making love,' and its normal.
Token: And when the woman has 4 penises in her, and then stands above the guys and pees on them, is that love making? Five midgets beating a man covered in Thousand Island dressing. Is that love making?
Cartman: I'm not fat. I'm big-boned.
Stan: No, Jay Leno's chin is big-boned. You are a big, fat ass
Stan: Aah, we're always running late you ugly skank.
Mrs. Crabtree: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!
Stan: I can't wait to own a fishing tank.
Mrs. Crabtree: Oh, neither can I.
Mr. Garrison: How would you like to go see the school counselor?
Cartman: How would you like to suck my balls?
Mr. Garrison: What did you just say?!
Cartman: Oh, I'm sorry (Clears throat and pulls out megaphone), actually what I said was, "How would you like to suck my balls, Mr. Garrison?"
Cartman: It's a man's obligation to stick his boneration in a women's separation; this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation.
Cartman: Hey! I'm taking my pig and ... screw you guys, I'm going home. This whole idea's stupid anyway.
Kyle: What the hell would you know you fat sweaty Mongoloid, you never get higher than a D.
Cartman: Hey! Why don't you go back to San Francisco with the rest of the Jews?
Kyle: There's no Jews in San Francisco, you retard!
Cartman: I'll kick you in the nuts!
fav. quote from the simpsons or similar cartoon
