How could you say you love me,
So much that you could die,
Then walk away and leave me,
Without even saying goodbye.

I've counted each day since you've gone,
Days, weeks and months that you went away,
I have a tear for each and every day,
For you loved me, but wouldn't stay.

How i felt the pain, each second, minute and hour,
While i sat by that damn phone,
Hoping you'd have a heart and call me,
And tell me why you left me all alone......



I haven't writen poetry in such a long time, that i'm afriad i've gone a bit rusty. But nevertheless please tell me what you all think.....

I like it!

Aww..sad and quick to the point. I like it...but I can't say that I love it because too many people write about break ups. But don't get me wrong it's a very good poem. :P

i love it.. mostly bc i can relate to it in more than one way.. good :)

it had rhyme which I find very important in poetry... but no beat
good job anyways

Excellent!

hmm, it's pretty good, but I think it could use a little work...in the second stanza, the last 3 lines rhymed, which didn't work with your pattern, because you were rhyming the second and 4th lines. your rhythm was pretty off too, but I DID Like how u said "damn phone" because i think sudden outbursts like thati n poetry really add to it and enunciate on the emotion. So thumbs up for that, but I think if you're gonna do such an overdone subject as matters of the heart, you really have to be careful to make it sound good. and be a little more creative with it. the ending was too blunt. seems like you left off in the middle of the poem. so that coudl use work too, i think. You DO have something here, I just think it needs work and it could be really really good, cuz I know lotsa people can relate to it. so, nicely done, do somethin' with it and repost it and I bet you'll be really happy with it. :D

Thank you all heaps for repyling, it means heaps to me, i didn't expected many people to even read my poem. I haven't writen anything in such a long time, like i said i've gone a bit rusty. I, myself, liked the first verse of my poem, but couldn't get the rest right and yes i agree, i ended a tad bit blunt. But it's how i look at the situtation i've writen about, it was blunt and just ended, for there was nothing else to write, for that was it all.....

So once again many thanks and hopefully i'll be able to re-post it with a bit more creative insight......