SaBS_2
10-01-2006, 01:38 AM
How generic/ bad is this poem? Need the info... Thought a poetry message board would be a good place to ask...
Today is your birthday,
Where many things can happen,
What else is there for me to say?
But in this hour where you’re standing,
At the glorious age of eighteen,
There’s only stars for you to reach,
For there is nothing in your way.
To think of all the mistakes I’ve made,
What an extraordinary miscalculation,
For the world of mine has been
Seemingly lost in the delicately fragile translation,
Of a more complex time when
There was no happy medium,
Balanced by the fact we couldn’t move past the introduction,
Where no man could ever begin to listen
To the most important vicissitudes
Of a woman’s words so precious,
With every syllable being untangled by your tongue,
Your voice enchanting whomever might be near.
What a day for three - eleven,
By this I mean there is no better,
Let this day be your haven,
While there are many in a year,
Today is your day,
To have, to hold dear.
Last and most certainly least compared to you,
I’ll take my leave with a perfectly calculated hooray!
It didn't take very long. And I might as well ask for opinions...
Long story behind this... And I was wondering... Don't exactly know what to ask actually...
:mrt: Mr. T... That's cute.
Today is your birthday,
Where many things can happen,
What else is there for me to say?
But in this hour where you’re standing,
At the glorious age of eighteen,
There’s only stars for you to reach,
For there is nothing in your way.
To think of all the mistakes I’ve made,
What an extraordinary miscalculation,
For the world of mine has been
Seemingly lost in the delicately fragile translation,
Of a more complex time when
There was no happy medium,
Balanced by the fact we couldn’t move past the introduction,
Where no man could ever begin to listen
To the most important vicissitudes
Of a woman’s words so precious,
With every syllable being untangled by your tongue,
Your voice enchanting whomever might be near.
What a day for three - eleven,
By this I mean there is no better,
Let this day be your haven,
While there are many in a year,
Today is your day,
To have, to hold dear.
Last and most certainly least compared to you,
I’ll take my leave with a perfectly calculated hooray!
It didn't take very long. And I might as well ask for opinions...
Long story behind this... And I was wondering... Don't exactly know what to ask actually...
:mrt: Mr. T... That's cute.