i feel like this is my best work it from past experiacnes and i play this on my acoustic rate 1-10 u dont like it fuck lets see u do better....


I am not so dead, just misunderstood my life is gone like i ever had one my day is done but i had no fun i'm think i'm dead...or maybe just fucked up....maybe just fucked up.....You turn away call me a freak just let me hold u a minute or two we will hang around before i am gone i think i'm dead or maybe just fucked up maybe just fucked up.......i think im dead maybe im fucked i think im dead i think i'm a dead i think i'm dead i think u caused it........

If its a song i cant say anything about it until i hear it, but just reading it i kinda didnt like it.....sorry

I didn't really like it either....Just because it really flow that well-it didn't really fit well or the structure

Definitely would have to hear it before I can rate it.

hmm, it would have to be one because there are no negatives. seriously, you cant even read that! learn to use punctuation, youre not clever enough to do the whole beat thing.
regards.

hmm, it would have to be one because there are no negatives. seriously, you cant even read that! learn to use punctuation, youre not clever enough to do the whole beat thing.
regards.

Hm. Would be nicer if you could pick up on your grammer flaws, like leaving out apostrophes in words such as 'you're' and 'can't'.

Back to the piece: It seems more of a rant by the way, but it is somewhat emotional. Has a touch of aggression and anger in there, I think. Somewhat confusing too with all the Ellipsis.

id use apostrophes if i could be bothereda aurabell. dont tiptoe around the subject, a 'touch of agression'! its a full blown stumble through forced, angry clauses!

id use apostrophes if i could be bothereda aurabell. dont tiptoe around the subject, a 'touch of agression'! its a full blown stumble through forced, angry clauses!

Ok. Fair Do's. :shrug: