life is a second
a split second at that
full of hope
look down at the welcome mat

never any warnings
of invasion to come
look at the sky
the right to be one

all your life you wonder about
the small things your faced with
all you time you wonder about
fact or ficion wether it's a myth

i've got news for you-

it's fiction
it's fact
it's friction
it's an act

your never to old to have fun
your never to young to be someone

that's what i have for you this fine day
go on, be jolly, have fun, be gay



I wrote this really fast, and it's very rare that I write poems. I only have one poem that I've ever written to compare it with. Which I will post at a later date if those of you who have read and replied to this thread are interested.

Tell me what you think!! Bad or Good. I'm interested in all critisism.

Good, not GREAT but hey... you odnt write alot so thats understood. - HA mine aint great.... and i write all the time!

i think...that you tried to take on too much with this poem. you tried to bundle up all of life's lessons into one little poem, like i try to do all the time, and it never really seems to work out.
my advice is to concentrate on one message at a time. you and i are too young to write about all of life in a few sentences.
i liked a few lines, though. it's simple...and the simplicity says something. i think you should trash rhyming, though. i try to rhyme only when i want to emphazise something.
i like the "you're never too young to be someone." i think i'll have to steal that for use when i become a teacher.

Mmm..."concentrate on one message at a time." (I havn't figured out how to work the quote tags yet). You might be on to something with that.